EMM Main Blog
The scariest news a dad can hear is that your daughter’s innocence has been stolen. Perhaps she was raped after a “roofie”slipped into her drink. Or her virginity was taken by a more experienced boyfriend —or man. Or maybe she was sexually assaulted, abused or traumatized by a relative, teacher or neighbor.
Dads can hardly imagine allowing their underage daughter to date, let alone imagine the unthinkable. But when daughter disaster strikes, what can a dad do? While pulling out a shotgun, clinching fists or mentally rehearsing a tortuous revenge may seem like a good idea, it’s not.
Helplessness, hurt, anger and sadness will settle in. But, the Bible —in particular Jesus —offers some guidance. In my years of counseling wounded young ladies and dads, I’ve seen the despair and frustration caused by rape, overdose, divorce and other daughter disasters. Fortunately, we serve an all-powerful, all-knowing God who is trustworthy. From this premise, and my experience, I offer the following outline to help dads deal with trauma associated with daughters.
Reports of the deadly Ebola virus are spreading faster than the highly-contagious virus itself. As the Center for Disease Control and its Division of Global Migration and Quarantine (DGMQ) work to prevent further outbreak in the US, Ebola is the most feared virus on the planet because once it infects a person, its ability to spread and cause death is astounding.
But the fact is fear of Ebola is more infectious than the biological virus. Fear of the fever is what’s driving our government to contain it. Fear is what’s capturing the headlines, and spreading like wildfire.
Like the biological virus, fear is a spiritual Ebola that can infect even the most faithful God-fearing Christian. In the book of Numbers, chapters 13-15, the Bible tells the account of how the spiritual Ebola of fear infected the Israelites —even though they had just witnessed God’s power to escape Egyptian slavery.
In the story, God told Moses to send out 12 men to check out the land promised to them, survey the fruitfulness and scope out the enemies. After 40 days, 10 of the 12 men reported the enemies were too big, and cities too strong. They injected fear which spread like Ebola through the population. The people “raised their voices,”“wept aloud”and “grumbled,”even proposing they choose a leader and return to Egypt and slavery.
Watch out for the world. It’s after you. It wants you in its cult following, wooing you with pleasures and power, fame and fortune, the nexus of excess. The cult of our culture provides the perfect distraction from what’s really important, and lures us with empty lusts, beliefs and religions.
It may not seem like an organized cult, but behind the apparent chaos and disorder is an enemy pulling the strings to entangle our mind, body and soul. It’s easy to overlook that we are targeted and marketed with endless desires to capture your time, energy and money. The world wants your worship, so you don’t worship the one who deserves it.
This cult of culture uses tangible ploys to steal our hearts. To get out of this world, God’s men have to acknowledge we are in a battle of unseen forces. It's a war made of daily, even minute by minute, spiritual battles.
Married men have gargantuan responsibility to provide, protect, lead, love, be available for the kids, shepherd the family faith and most importantly wear the pressure that accompanies these responsibilities and burdens. In the midst of the battle, we also have the daunting assignment of cultivating and protecting that most mysterious marital commodity called – I-N-T-I-M-A-C-Y. You know – that unspoken, life-giving connection with your wife that feels like Christmas morning.
When it comes to the issue of connection between husbands and wives I am reminded of the cell phone commercial that asked: How many bars do you have?” Everyone gets it. The more bars you see displayed on your screen the better your connection. Now ask the same question measuring your connection level with your wife. Full bars? Two bars? No service?
Driven by love for his family and faced with seemingly insurmountable financial burdens, the lead character and mild-mannered father “Walt,”in the Emmy-Award winning television show “Breaking Bad,”decides to use his chemistry knowledge to make “fat stacks”of quick cash by “cooking”meth —an addictive, destructive and dangerous street drug.
Walt breaks bad, and despite attempts to keep his new business under wraps, the inevitable lies, deception and lawlessness catches up with him, ironically damaging the one thing he valued the most —his family relationships. The show’s popularity has captured tons of viewers, both Christians and non-Christians alike, helping make “binge watching”a new term for watching several episodes at a time.
At Every Man Ministries, we’ve caught the show’s bug too, and we think there’s more to learn about this show than just how to get caught up in the drug trade.
Here’s the key point: God’s in the breaking bad business.