Be Her Hero: How Not To Suck As A Husband 4 Part Series
Let's get honest--most men need as much help as they can get to make their marriage better. This series will provide that needed help… in a big, big way! Doug has an amazing ability to get guys laughing and then jam-them-full with needed biblical truths that are doable and "men-friendly." This 4 part series will leave the guys encouraged and hope-filled by the 7 simple action steps as well as leave them wanting more from Doug. Good news--it's coming!
Regardless of the condition of your marriage (i.e. strong, average, struggling), Doug Fields knows how to talk to men in their language about what they don’t want to hear about (regarding their marriage). Since marriage was God’s idea and sex was God’s invention (thank you God) husbands have got to figure out how to love their wives more than anyone else alive. In this first session Doug sets the foundational stage of marriage and challenges men with the first of seven very practical ideas: “Don’t say everything you think!” Violating this principle never works! It creates defensiveness, stirs anger, induces shame, doesn't motivate and no one wins when men are undisciplined with their words. There’s better ways and Doug shares those in his funny, penetrating and challenging style. This first session will definitely surprise a lot of guys by Doug’s humor, straightforward language and will have guys looking forward to the next sessions.
Anyone can fall in love! All it takes is a pulse to fall in love… but to thrive in marriage, a plan is needed. Thriving in marriage is the goal… not survival. No one goes into marriage thinking, “If I can just gut this marriage out a few years (survive) I can walk away with minimal child support and the couch.” Developing a plan to help your wife “win” in the battles of life is the main objective. In order to do this, you've got to develop some skills as a husband and Doug shares two more (of seven actions) that will help you breath life into your wife with words that empower, inspire and build up. She’s dying for her husband’s affirmation! When the need of love, communication and emotional intimacy goes unmet, the results are many:withdrawal, low level resentment, bitterness, lack of sexual interest, and ultimately she’ll look elsewhere to get those needs met. In addition to words,Doug challenges men to learn her “love language” and pour it on. And while their busy doing that… listen, listen, listen! Listening is the language of love and Doug provides very practical ways to become a better listener and focus on her real needs. Again, guys will be laughing so much they won’t pay attention to how difficult it is to change. Difficult, but totally possible.
Even the best marriages struggle! But, when a marriage is built on a biblical foundation that recognizes that marriage is God’s idea, marriage is God’s plan,and being “one” is God’s goal for marriage… men will be more willing to fight…work… strive… to make their marriage thrive. This concept of “oneness” can become a game-changer when a man realizes that wounding his spouse actually wounds himself. The opposite is also true—enhancing a spouse’s heart… enhances oneself too. Doug continues this series with his entertaining style and helping men understand that women actually prefer “small”… small acts of kindness add up to a big deal to wives. It’s the “little things” that led to big problems and it’s the little things that lead to big change. Doug shares a list of small actions that are a big deal to women (you might be surprised). One of those small areas he mentions is “non-sexual touch”… (not a guy’s favorite topic).But, when they master the art of touch, (“affection without intention”) they’ll watch their wife come alive—her body needs it and so does her heart. The learning, the laughter and the inspiration continues in this life-changing series.
All 4 sessions begin with a short peek into the creation story of Adam and Even and in this session Doug picks up on Adam’s first call of duty… which results in him throwing Eve under the bus. Men have been doing this since the beginning of time--Sin. Blame. Shame. More Blame.Doug uses this example and makes a strong case for men to take responsibility for what has happened in the [past] marriage, take responsibility for their actions…and work toward being her hero—naked and unashamed. Quit blaming! Quit blaming her! Quit blaming the job. Quit blaming the kids. Quit blaming the pace of life. Basically, quit being a little boy and be a man. The final two action-steps (of 7) require men to hold up the mirror, take responsibility and stop chasing empty dreams. Doug addresses guys having affairs—not necessarily with other women, but having an affair with the CHASE—their job. Work is the object of their affection… the mobile phone is their mistress… the laptop their lover. Busyness is the enemy of depth and too many marriages are shallow because of pace, misguided priority and pride. This hard-to-receive message is made a little easier by Doug’s humor and honesty… but it ends strong and passionate for men to rise up and be God’s man in their marriage.