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Red Zone Friendships: Men meet but rarely help each other score big when they connect
|In a recent study by Men’s Health it was revealed that the top two ways men stay connected with friends are texting (#1) and “get togethers” (#2). The reason we prefer these ways are twofold: texting fits the factual, short, bottom line style of communication we appreciate and “get togethers” feed our need for closer, interpersonal camaraderie and connection with each other. Whether it’s just the guys or the guys with the gals we usually huddle by gender and “dive deeper.” Guys usually assemble around wherever the meat is being grilled and sample it with a beverage in hand. At the same time, the girls keep it real in the kitchen while prepping for the meal and talk about, well, everything. That’s where the similarities end because guys do nottalk about everything.
In fact, guys prefer to keep it on the surface when we get together. We stick to sports, work updates, kids sports, house projects, power tools, cars, working out, and our favorite recreational pursuit. So let’s get this straight: in the one setting with the most potential power in our lives to build strong friendships we, by habit or by choice, keep things on the surface? Exactly. Like a bunch of icebergs, we present the tips of our lives while the big stuff causing emotional heartburn, relational pain, or spiritual darkness (like our marriages, temptations, families, finances, and inner demons) stay buried, unprocessed, and unresolved. We leave with full stomachs and empty souls, more lonely than when we first arrived because no one knows what’s really going on in our lives. The irony is that most of us spin it at these gatherings and say when asked “It’s all good bro.”
STRAIGHT TALK: Get fit for Christ’s sake
|Pssst (leaning in) …To be a man other men want to follow, you have to look like someone they want to follow.
Form follows function. Men are visual creatures. We notice form, both in men and women. And, whether you like it or not, men make judgments about people based on their appearance.
I’m going to break this down for you, and shoot straight, because our message of hope and love is going to be received much better if we look like we are taking care of the body God gave us. It’s human nature to be attracted to physical health.
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I am praying for you each week during the month. Next month, I’m going to ask for your help with a few things. Again, take courage and live as God’s man, flaws and all. Don’t let your struggles keep you from doing good. Come to the site and share your comments and thoughts, and encourage others! Until next week…
YOU ARE THE REVOLUTION!
Kenny Luck is the founder of Every Man Ministries and the men’s pastor at Saddleback Church. His 20th book – SLEEPING GIANT: No Movement of God without Men of God – is the proven blueprint for men’s ministries, and was recently released through B&H Publishing. Leadership kits and church resources published by LifeWay. Watch and read more of Kenny’s teaching here at EveryManMinistries.com.
October 2013 Volume 1
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