Character or Comfort
“Watch over your heart with all diligence, for from it flows the springs of life. Proverbs 4:23
At a men’s retreat, my church surveyed 550 men with the following question: What causes you to disconnect from God on a continual, habitual, or fatal basis? More than 90 percent of the men indicated (anonymously) that lust, porn and sexual fantasy were their top reasons for spiritual disconnection. Many men took advantage of the survey’s anonymity to reveal their involvement in love affairs, their compulsive addition to pornography, and the inner struggles that plague their consciences and drain their spirits. Shockingly, more than fifty men at the retreat admitted that they were having — or have had — an extramarital affair. Equally shocking was the fact that the majority of the men were serving in key leadership positions throughout the church.
My point? You are not alone when you admit that you have something less than sexual integrity. At a staff Christmas party, Derek’s wife witnessed firsthand the bonds he had formed with several ladies a work. They acted as if she weren’t even there — by now they talked with him and even placed their hands on him. He hadn’t stepped over the physical line with them but his wife didn’t see this as acceptable behavior. Actually, it gave her the ammunition she needed to spring her own ambush and subsequent departure from the marriage.
Men, we are watchmen who must stand guard and diligently screen what we allow into our hearts for consumption. Otherwise, the full cycle of good intention, failure, and guilt repeats itself and will keep repeating itself until a final, painful event that leads to devastation. The big issues that impact our spiritual health and relationships require more than just abstaining from certain behaviors or words. It is an issue of the heart, mind, and soul.
Father, thank you for the strength given to protect my sexual integrity.