Sex is not about our individual needs. While sexual self-focus is normal everywhere else, it is not normal in the Christian marriage bed.
Because of male hard-wiring, men don’t naturally have that Christian view of sex. A man’s sexual triggers lead him to sexual blind spots, especially within our vividly sexualized culture. So, as men, we must be taught and led toward this pure focus by Christ, and we must be helped along in that direction by our wives. Surely one reason God gave us wives was to encourage us to take part in the divine nature rather than to stagnate in our natural sexual bents.
If you can find a truly good wife, she is worth more than precious gems! Her husband can trust her, and she will richly satisfy his needs. She will not hinder him, but help him all her life. (PROVERBS 31:10-11, TLB)