July 8

The Good Wife

 

He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord.  ––Proverbs 18:22

 

Some of the funniest passages in the Bible are in Proverbs, and many reflect Solomon’s woes with his many wives and concubines. Let’s not forget that Moses was very clear about polygamy: Don’t do it. He was always monogamous (his first wife, Zipporah, died, and then he remarried). Solomon? He had a whopping 700 wives and 300 concubines. (How did even remember all their names?) His woes are reflected in some of the proverbs he wrote, such as saying that “a quarrelsome wife is like a constant dripping on a rainy day” (Proverbs 27:15).

 

While we can chuckle at such verses, there is sadness behind them: Solomon didn’t follow God’s designed order. He did not adhere to the mandate that God laid down in the Garden when He announced, “That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh” (Genesis 2:24). Notice God says “wife” and not “wives,” and “one flesh.” In fact, in Solomon’s old age he was led astray by his foreign wives to worship pagan gods.

 

The most positive things said about women in Proverbs come in the last proverb. Here’s the thing, though: Proverbs 31 wasn’t written by Solomon, and nor was it written to women as some sort of “Christian wife litmus test.” It’s written to a man! It’s advice being given to one “King Lemuel” (whom some scholars say is Solomon, while others dispute that) by an “oracle.” The prevailing opinion is that it’s actually words of advice from Solomon’s mother about the type of woman he should seek. Unfortunately, Solomon didn’t listen to his mom.

 

Man of God, if the Lord has given you a wife, that’s a good thing! Re-read today’s verse… it doesn’t say a good wife is a good thing, but simply, a wife. By grace, as the Bridegroom, Jesus has given You something extremely precious that mirrors His Bride: your wife. Treat your wife as you would Christ. Even more, how you love your wife is how you love Christ. Think about that.

 

I know some of you have been divorced or even abandoned by a spouse. I am truly sorry you have been through that kind of pain. But that’s not Jesus’ plan for you. His plan is that when you marry, you and your wife not only become one flesh physically, but also spiritually. When we cherish our wives, blessings follow. Sound simple? It’s not. But the more we love our spouse as Jesus loves us—sacrificially, always asking what we can do for them, rather than the other way around—the more joy you will find in your marriage.

 

Don’t be Solomon—be the man of God and husband God designed you to be.

 

Father, help me take a more sacrificial approach in my marriage and allow me to view my wife exactly the way You do.