What do rules and obedience have to do with great sex? Everything. After all, why did God give us these commands? To torture us? To test us?
No. He gave them to complete us.
God knew our desire for intimacy–and how we could attain it–from the beginning. He knew that women give and receive intimacy through sharing, talking, hugging, and touching. After all, He created her so that men might not be lonely. These traits are perfectly fitted to that purpose.
But God also knew that men would be too hardhearted to appreciate these subtleties and that they would ignore their wives’ needs. When they do this, their wives wither emotionally or they become embittered and independent. Oneness never grows. God couldn’t leave something this important to the whims of mood.