One-third of all marriages now result from online dating sites. So these days, if your profile captures attention, you have a higher rate of opportunity. And, as you review other women’s profiles, you have to decipher if you are reading fact or fiction. If you’ve ever ventured into this dating matrix, I’m guessing you’ve scratched your head wondering if there’s any truth to their profiles’ advertising.
So I want to encourage you to take a step back, and ask yourself, “Am I advertising the truth, and acting the way God wants me to?” Or “Am I putting up a facade, which in turn, is setting me up for dating failure?”
Before even answering that question, you might want to answer this, “what is my goal with dating?” What are you trying to accomplish? Why are you going through this in the first place? What’s at the heart of your dating?
I think today’s cultural man uses dating to use women. Marriage is a possible repercussion “when the right one” comes around. In the meantime, it’s all about getting to that third date.
But for God’s man, dating is a strategy to fulfill God’s purpose and plan for your life, alongside a mate who is on the same path, and compliments God’s mission. If you honestly seek to serve God and His plan, then dating becomes a straight-forward objective: Connect with a Christian who has the same goal to share God’s love.
Then, be patient to see if there’s any truth in her advertising, while acting genuinely after God’s heart, not hers.
Consider this “Quick” vs. “Quality” comparison. Which one results in a God-honoring, time-tested, battle-ready, bullet-proof relationship that can last?
|External attraction||Internal Beauty|
|Insecurity driven||Identity driven|
|Meet emotional needs||Friendship|
|Common interests||Common relationship in Jesus|
|Becomes an obstacle to faith||Enhances faith|
|Learn little||Learn a lot|
|Dishonors God||Honors God|
|Dishonors other person||Honors other person|
|Poor foundation||Solid foundation|
I’m not ignoring how hot women can appear. But if your goal is true to God’s way, then there will be truth in your advertising, and your behavior will honor God. And, the best news? She will totally be attracted to your God-focus, self-control, and patience because there’s peace and safety in a relationship when the man is under God’s control.
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Learn more about God’s plan to navigate the dating matrix.
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Kenny Luck is the president and founder of Every Man Ministries. As the former men’s pastor at Saddleback Church in California and current leadership pastor at Crossline Community Church, Kenny has found the proven way to improve men’s ministries around the world. Sleeping Giant is this blueprint, and gives men the tools they need to lead and understand their own men’s ministry. Watch Kenny’s teachings at EveryManMinistries.com and start your men’s group today!